No cap? Yes cap! Get on da freakin’ point, dumbass!!
nonsense
Shitposts and other such silliness.
ounce (n): the unit of weight (force) which, if it falls upon one causes one to utter “ow,” once.
My flirting strategy for pulling autistic trans women

I can be your bestie 😇 or your beastie 🍤
Poob has it for you. and by “it”, haha, well…
poob has had it up to here with you
what if I started calling myself Seto Caoimhe
Weekend at Bernie’s good ending: Larry takes the money and actually gets the sex change operation
I refuse to call it getting my freak on because to me sex is a normal and natural thing
Hey are you doing okay? I know you’ve been through a lot lately and I can’t help but notice that your irises and pupils have turned into a flat gradient.
they’re calling it the movie that smells you back!
the thing that people don’t realise is that I am normal
not sure how I feel about the nodding emoji
he’s called Maes Hughes but actually he’s normal sized
My goal in life? To have a novel fungal infection named after me
in the next Street Fighter game they should let M. Bison finally transition
Bless the V-22 Osprey, a design that is looks simultaneously so ridiculous and so cool that it seems like it must have been designed by a twelve-year-old and has the safety record to match, continuing to get U.S. marines killed for two decades.

when all you have is a hammer everything looks like a brush
would transition have saved Barry the Chopper?
*evil overlord voice* I will not succumb to link rot
Balatro Wonderworld
Don’t Forget-Don’t Watch Mr. Beast mashup
re-form the Ireland Simpsons Fans Party
Orthanc you very much :)
finally, they made a burger that can consent
You’ve seen them. The videos. The chocolate videos. There is a man out there doing things that were never meant to be done to cocoa beans.
What the fuck. That is not tea. That’s not even a kettle. What the fuck.
Look at this shit. This CANNOT be allowed to continue.
He doesn’t even set up his shitting fake chocolate chessboard correctly. THE BOTTOM RIGHT SQUARE SHOULD BE WHITE.
HE HAS TO BE STOPPED. This can’t be allowed to continue.
SPRINGS? CHOCOLATE SPRINGS? We cannot allow this.
We all know what needs to be done.
Okay the above is a joke I do not wish anything bad on Amaury Guichon. I just kind of dislike his videos. There is something offputting to me about his overly clean, edited style. How his artisanry feels like artifice in his immaculate, minimalist kitchen-set that always looks like it’s never been used before. How he creates these things and starts eating them on camera immediately, demonstrating that they were never meant to be consumed as food, only consumed as content1. It feels like watching a How It’s Made video for production a line that that was made only to be on the show, whose output is going directly into a landfill rather than something that is of use to someone.
Is this unfair? Yes. It would probably be more reasonable to treat these videos as a timelapse video of a sculpture being created or, being less fair, a preppy Epic Meal Time. It’s spectacle and art2 and it’s just a particular popular artist I don’t care for. I am just being hater. It’s fine. Chocolate man is fine. I don’t like his videos.
I am normal.
I bet it feels amazing to be an enemy made of a bunch of separate sprites that look like spheres
oh fcyj
im autims
:)
Very upset that my title pitch got rejected.

full conflict of interest disclosure: There was a Sewer Man
Really surprised but pleased at the reveal at the end of the episode that I am going to be the the new Doctor Who

you wouldn’t download an opinion
I got the job as the new cat from the I have hired this cat to stare at you meme
instead of the great man of history theory I propose the shitty man of history theory: history is mostly shaped by systematic forces but sometimes there’s a huge cunt who fucks everything up

In Sonic Unleashed the name Jungle Joyride doesn’t really work for the werehog version of the level, where the gameplay is much slower and combat-focused. Instead they should have called the nighttime version of the level Jungle G.B.H.
Mewtwo is the Shadow the Hedgehog of pokémon
Paul Moran & Donal O’Shea

I’ve noticed a pattern of behaviour online and I want to coin a new internet adage:
Caoimhe’s law: please be nice to Caoimhe
Italian trans woman named Bianca Cogiati
Rationalism is fundamentally the belief that if one trains really hard it is possible to do a kamehameha in real life but for the mind.
I am evil and kind, while my girlfriend is good and cruel.
We make it work.
The year is 2025. The smart bomb has been replaced with the woke mob.
Donkey Kong Jr. while still a child kart raced Mario. Now his son adult son, Donkey Kong, races Mario. From this we can conclude that the lifespan of a jumpman is much longer than that of a kong.
we should extend the International Phonetic Alphabet to include all the noises cats make
still waiting on that Intel® software technology...

please write to your member of parliament to tell them to listen to my podcast
be the sea you want in to change the world
my girlfriend is so sweet and kind and also evil and mean to me (in ways that are fun)
date night date bite
any good whale fall lately?
the great Sage, equal to Eggman
merry shitscram
Conway’s Game of Wife
going to discover a new animal and name it a sergal to fuck with furries
the law of e-Caoimhe-lent exchange
getting every vaccination I can so I get quintuple autism like Sun Wukong
orkz’ life cycle is to go to somewhere far away, die gruesomely and release a cloud of spores so their bloodlust is a reproductive urge
look I know you said that this was just going to be a light, casual thing but the infinite rocket crate in the corner
you said that you’re not mad at me but there was a suspiciously large cache of health packs and ammo outside the entrance to your room
your public transport network is your public transport net worth
me: I promise I won’t go on about The Ring
me after two pints:

if you look at it it destroys your bones
Disqualified from No Nut November for having had performance-enhancing surgery
fucked that quantum dot organic light-emitting diode televisions look the same as every other TV instead of being dimensionfucked techoörganic nightmares
learning to spindash
I am not posting as much on here as I was on Cohost. One reason is that I have just been really busy and tired recently.
Another is simply I spent a lot of time on Cohost. I have praised it a lot and how it felt more deliberate and less of a trap than other social media sites, but it was still a place I could open to kill time and scroll be driven by the small joys of getting notifications. I felt I got more out of it than other places where I did that, and it fostered that addiction at bit less, but it still did it.
But also there’s a psychological barrier. I still have this feeling that this site is something serious and I have to write in clear semi-formal prose and have something to say. Just posting “I won’t tell anyone if I win the lottery but there will be sins” feels wrong. Which is silly. This is my website. I can write anything I want on here. And I enjoy shitposting. I should be doing it. Maybe If I can get into the flow of treating this place more casually I can feel a bit more open again. Perhaps if I can get over the embarrassment of it I might even post some kink stuff.
But there is another reason too: Posting on here is much more deliberate. I use Jekyll as a static-site generator so making a post involves creating a new text file on my PC and running a small command line script to build and push the changes to my server. It’s not a huge effort, but it’s certainly more than using a website. I like building this site.
Sylvia (quoting someone else) said that “a personal website is like a model train set, in that it’s never really done and you work on it constantly in the hopes that someone will see it” and I think that’s a great comparison! I have a todo list for ideas for this site as long as my arm and as a programmer by trade I both enjoy and know how to make extra work for myself doing it. It was originally just a site built with the default Jekyll minima theme but I have bolted on a lot of extra features and generators. There’s a pipeline to build Pico-8 games from source and an entire podcast processing system and these all run every time I regenerate the site. The overhead with these wasn’t too bad at first but over time it has just taken longer and longer to build and push the site for small changes.
But this is just another problem to solve! I enjoy doing this. I already do have a janky system in place for testing the site while skipping some of the more intensive steps for testing, but I can’t use it to push changes to the site because it would fuck up certain pages which would get replaced with versions that are missing things.
I have some idea already of how I want to go about this and it involves dividing up the site a bit more cleanly into discrete parts. This is going to result in moving some stuff around and in particular I think I will be moving everything in the gallery to a new URL scheme so any current links to my exhibits are going to break. Sustaining a few 404s is fine and if I do find anyone linking to specific pages I might set up some manual redirects but I don’t want to have to set up a million redirect rules. I have too many already and I think I’m going to be removing most of them other than for the Atom feeds to reduce clutter as well.
And then, maybe shitposting?